Hey!
With some of the changes going online recently, I thought I would talk a bit about this topic today.
Last year Google added ID based age vertification, and now Discord seems to be doing the same at a more vocal and heated scale.
There's also some people choosing to drop Anonymity after becoming famous online. And how that brings emotional changes and identity crisis.
Rather than worrying about the loss of an existing identity, it's grief over the loss of a *lack* of identity.
It got me thinking of the history of being Anonymous online, it's downsides, it's benefits, and could we see the loss of being anonymous online in the future?
(I am currently semi-anonymous. To be 100% anonymous would be avoiding any naming or identity entirely.
But it depends on the person! Some view "anonymous" as anyone who doesn't reveal their real life identity. While others view "anonymous" as strictly only people without a name or ongoing continuity. I will talk a bit about both probably.)
I feel like when the topic of anonymity and usernames comes up, I can't help but think of the Internet pre-social media.
That's not to say the Internet before socials was unsocial, but more it had a different culture and way of seeing things.
I feel like since that was the way I first found the Internet back then, that it's been engrained into me to some degree. I still call some online friends by their username, even when we both know each other's real identity. And still feel some fear of telling IRL friends about the things I get into online. Like it's some big secret, and not something that's easy to find with a simple google search.
I grew up during the time where advice like "don't share your real name online" was common place. It was seen as a very risky thing to do.
Yet when looking backwards, it's crazy how quickly that changed. In less than 5 years it felt like everything had changed overnight.
But let me focus on my perspective on the before period first.
In the early to mid 2000s Internet, usernames or handlenames were the default way of being.
When you use a username, you are choosing a different identity than your real life name. It could be related to your personality, a hobby or fandom you love, or random words and numbers put together to get past unique naming.
When I used to go to forums, and sites inspired by the forum system of Internet discussion, it felt like your identity took a backseat. Because on a forum you weren't the main character, the main character was the subject of that forum. So if you were on an anime forum you'd be talking about anime, a video game forum would be talking about video games, and a tech forum would be talking about tech.
The closest comparison on the current 2020s Internet I would say are fandom subreddits, or YouTube niches. Everyone in those spaces are agreeing to talk about the same thing.
However one difference between forums and subreddits/imageboards, is that because they were divided into multiple sections, you would sometimes find off topic spaces or personal spaces. It wasn't against the rules to be off topic, as long as you did it in the proper off topic section of the forum. Kind of like how Discord often as a "general" chat or "off topic" chat in their servers.
This is because even when hiding their identities, people still enjoy talking about themselves and connecting with others sometimes. I often find that it's easier to connect when you have something in common with someone, and gradually branch out from there.
A lot of my former closest online friends came from forums, chatrooms, fandoms, and a shared sense of belonging to a small but close group.
Those are more on the positive side of things.
But I would also mention the negative side of hiding identity.
You'd get a lot of spammers, trolls, bots, and heated arguing as well.
Because there was little to no consequences, people would often cause trouble out of malice or for their own amusement.
That's not to say it doesn't happen now, but it's different when your own real life or career is on the line at any moment. When what you say is under your real name, you behave differently than when it's not tied back to you.
Eventually MySpace & Facebook came along, with requirements that you use your real life full name on them. And with that, it changed how people acted online, and interacted with each other.
While forums had their topic as the focus, on social media *YOU* were the focus. Everyone got their own page, and could fill it with their own lives, own takes, friends and family, and interests. As some call it, it went from the "*my* info about topic" era, to the "info about *me*" era.
I can't really go super deeply into this era, because I was in it first hand for maybe 2 years or less. I tried opening a Facebook with my real name when I was younger, interacted with some friends, but as soon as the older generations got on, I fled. Because it didn't feel like "our space" anymore.
It felt like anyone and everyone could see, and watched closely.
And ever since then, I felt confused about my own connections to identity. I started disconnecting from my IRL identity, dissociating from it even.
...Why did I feel so afraid of being seen as "me"? Flesh and bone me?
And yet, then why did I still crave being seen with a layer of separation?
I feel like even before the cyberbullying I went through, I still felt that way by nature. But that period made me intensify that urge to hide myself.
There's something that's terrifying of being witnessed.
For me attention usually meant bad attention. So I started craving the ability to not be perceived.
And I lived that way for about a decade or so. Almost entirely posting anonymously, never telling anyone, and separating it in my mind. Wondering if people would view me differently, if they saw the different parts of myself in the same space?
But eventually I craved for something deeper than existing as a void-person. Tired of sharing just my thoughts in an empty vacuum, but never being seen for the *person* behind those thoughts. That the more I tried to disconnect from myself, the less real I felt.
...I wonder if people understand what I'm talking about?
Even now I still gravitate towards the sites that are more anonymous-friendly and topic based. Rather than mainstream real life based social media.
The more there is a push for removing anonymity online, the more anxious I feel about it.
In the past I felt like everyone was allowed to choose whether or not they wanted to be their IRL self online or not. That it was up to each person to decide that for themselves.
But now it feels like that choice may be taken away in the future.
When Discord announced it was going to require seemingly everyone to verify their accounts with a real life ID, the Internet was outraged. Discord said it was to protect teens from seeing adult content, but it went against why many people used Discord.
Most people on Discord don't go by their real life names. Some people do, but the majority don't.
So when something associated with their real life identity was forced on them, it felt like a slap in the face. Not only for privacy concerns, data leaks, etc. But also because people believe that you shouldn't need an ID to post online.
That requiring an ID goes against the original spirit of the Internet. As well as increasing the dangers and threats by forcing it on people.
If you require a verified email or phone number, it's more strict than no vertification. But in theory you could still make a throwaway email, an alternative phone number, etc.
But with an ID, regardless of if it's privately or publicly, you only get 1 per person. The only thing more sensitive than a public ID (at least in the US) is your social security number.
It's one thing to go by your real name as your username, and another to give your birthday, address, gender, etc. via ID.
So people are afraid if this becomes the norm online, that it could mean the loss of anonymity. (Or at least on major mainstream platforms.)
Let's pretend for a minute that we've reached the bad future, and all mainstream websites now require every user to give an ID to post there. And let's say they also require you to use only your real name and face as well.
What would change about the Internet?
I think it would depend on the kind of internet user.
That's not to mention all the changes that society would go through, and how it would effect freedom of speech.
But I won't go into that this time, as I can't really predict that as much.
Sometimes I think about how being anonymous and famous at the same time is more common in Japan. There are many celeberities there without even a single photo of them online.
And as time passes, the more I wonder, "how do they do it? how do they do it when cameras are everywhere, and data leaks are happening all the time?".
That's not even getting into if you're registered as a business, or self employed, you will need to use your legal name. There comes a point where you can't just put your online name on documents or forms.
That maybe being anonymous has always been a temporary thing? Unless you're really dedicated about it.
Sometimes as a creator, I feel like I must one day graduate from being anonymous.
I don't think it'd be impossible, but it'd become increasingly difficult the further you go.
Artists like Ado perform in the shadows, while other virtual artists may wear facemasks, or put objects to cover their head.
That maybe being known is easier to maintain than being unknown. I'm not sure.
So why does losing anonymity bother people then?
I think it comes down to multiple reasons.
There is a certain freedom that comes with being unknown.
There are also some risks of being known, and the more you are known the bigger that risk.
Another part of being anonymous is the joy of being forgotten.
If you say something stupid, or critical, or just anything that's not great, it's gone.
When you grow as a person, you can leave that phase behind you.
Because when every single little thing is archived, the opposite happens.
People are constantly bringing up stupid things you said, or dumb things you did, or decades old rumors and narratives.
I have mixed feelings towards anonymity. Because it's brought me both so much peace and development over the years. But also a lot of heartbreak and suffering.
A lot of the worst things happen when people are anonymous and feel like they will never face any consequences for negative behavior.
It can feel both freeing and limiting at the same time.
So eventually, I do want to move forward and show myself more.
I think for a long time I've had a lot of fear and dread around this topic. It makes my stomach sink thinking about it sometimes.
...Because, then it's for real right?
It's not just in my daydreaming imagination, or silly nothings on the internet anymore.
Once it's connected to my real identity, I can't go back.
I mean, I could try, but with how AI has been developing, who knows where we'll be in 20 years from now?
Maybe someone could scrape the Internet in 10 seconds, and instantly locate someone based on their writing patterns.
People have done it before without AI, so imagine where it could go in the future.
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I think that's why someday in the future, I want to do a face reveal. But as long as I still have that control, I want it to be when I'm ready to.
In some ways it'll change a lot, but in other ways it won't change much.
Because at the end of the day, this is all me here. It's me typing, me playing games, me drawing pictures. That doesn't change.
I'm not really the type to play *as* a character, but more hide *behind* the character.
I'm not really super good at roleplaying. At least I don't think I am yet.
I feel like because I've been online so long, and I've been creating so long, that I feel like my real life self is underdeveloped compared to other people.
Ever since I first went online back then, I've struggled to identify as myself.
Even after making multiple blog posts about it, there's still a lot I need to process around this topic.
In the near future, I will start using my legal name for the legal side of things.
And after that, I will be on the way to the end of my anonymous days.
Although I think even after I face reveal myself, I will probably still appear as a character on most days. That's what feels most comfortable to me.
---
...I wonder what previous generations of artists would feel about artists becoming their own artwork?
Would that feel more or less artist-like to them?
In other words, as a virtual artist, most of my self portraits are not of my real life self, but my virtual self.
That one day my virtual art may outnumber the photos I've taken. And how strange that is.
Anyways I'm kinda rambling now...
I think this is a discussion we'll continue to have in the future, as the Internet continues to change over time.
But what do you think about it?
Thanks for reading! Feel free to reply to this if you have any thoughts on the topic.
See you later!
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